One year ago this week I was involved in a fender bender on my way home from work. My car at the time, a 2000 Nissan, received damages that exceeded the admittedly low value of the vehicle. No one was hurt and after the inevitable paperwork and insurance hassles, I became the proud owner of a Volkswagen Jetta wagon. I drive the car daily and love it.
The fender bender occurred right around the time I was experiencing a fair degree of stress and unhappiness. Now I should add that this was very much of the First World variety and I’d venture to guess no different from what any of you who read this blog have experienced. But as we all know, perspective can be a funny thing. Once you’re removed from a particular difficulty, perspective is right there waiting for you. Yet when you’re in the thick of it; well, then perspective is nowhere to be seen.
Upon receiving the Jetta, my stress and unhappiness gradually dissipated. Well, technically, it didn’t go anywhere; it’s just that I began to see a path forward. And maybe I viewed the Jetta as a literal and figurative vehicle that would help me get there.
This being the year anniversary of the fender bender and subsequent Jetta, I couldn’t help but consider the different vehicles in my adult life: mostly a series of Hondas with a Subaru and Mercury thrown in at points along the way. I drove these cars when I was loving life, when I was miserable and every state in between., Any altering of my state of being incurred inside my heart and mind; the vehicles were, just as advertised, nothing more than a mode of transport. So, in actuality, the Jetta didn’t take me to a better place and neither did the previous cars we owned. I brought myself to these places, after seeking, in many instances, guidance along the way.
I suppose it’s tempting for us to seek meaning in these literal and figurative vehicles from throughout our lives – bestow onto them some sort of power, or, at the very least, a sense of good fortune. If I didn’t go to that party, would I have met my future wife? If I didn’t take that particular shuttle service from the airport, would I have bumped into my old college roommate? What would life be like if I still drove my old car; if the fender bender never occurred?
My sense is that we embrace vehicles as the easy way out; a means of helping explain that which lacks a proper explanation. It’s better than just accepting the ugly truth; how in many regards, stuff just happens and stress and unhappiness can occur at any time. We like to think we have control but we really don’t; it largely depends on timing and how quickly we can adjust to the inevitable curve balls life sends our way.
And as for those dependable vehicles, upon which we lay so many hopes and fears? Well, in the end, they’re just along for the ride.
shishkabobgirldad 