Editorial note: Opinions expressed here are solely those of the blogger
Several years ago I was having dinner with a group of friends. One was finishing his cocktail right as the waiter approached our table. The waiter asked this friend if he wanted another of the same. My friend said yes and then turned to us, shrugged his shoulders and said, “Dance with the one that brought you.”
I had never heard the expression before and truthfully, I’m not really sure my friend used it in the right conext. But I got the gist of it, reinfored after all these years. Stay loyal. Especially to those who have gone out of their way for you.
It’s interesting because even though I haven’t thought of the expression in years, I considered it twice this past week. The first time was when I was talking to one of our kids about the soon-approaching start of school. We were discussing the possibility of making new friends and I was mentioning how, in my view, there tends to be two types of people: Those who are constantly seeking new friendships and expanding their sphere. And those who, once they find their people, stick with them.
But later in the week, I realized that what I said wasn’t entirely accurate. That it’s not necessarily one or the other. That a middle ground exists.
Even though I’m an extrovert and enjoy meeting new peope, I’ve always thought of myself as somoene who finds their core group and then sticks with them. For some reason I’ve always used the expression “when you’re in; you’re in” to describe my attitude toward friendships, which in reality is pretty similar to “Dance with the one that brought you.”
Without getting into details, I found myself in a situation this week where I wanted to thank a group of people who had been particularly loyal and helpful to me. Most were people that I’d known for quite some time and we’d cultivated a relationship. But one I barely knew; had just met, in fact, but had been tremendously helpful to me. I will make it my aim to be helpful to them at some point.
The reality is, there are vaguely corny expressions for just about every single occassion. And it’s usally tempting to just ignore them. But this week served as a much-needed reminder that we truly do get what we give. All the more reason to keep giving.
shishkabobgirldad 